Yesterday, Wayne and I spent half of the day shopping. There were a few stores we had tried to get to during the week, but couldn’t quite get there before they closed at 6 pm. So we had our list and started out. I found several cute things. Normally, when I buy things I wasn’t expecting to buy, they sit somewhere in the house until I can do something with them. Sometimes they sit there for so long that I decide to get rid of them without having ever used them.
Yesterday, we got home and I set about putting everything into its place. The clothes went into the closet. I bought a few small candles and put them where I knew I’d use them immediately (and I did this morning). And I bought some glasses and a string of blue colored gems 💎 for the kitchen. I washed the glasses, and immediately used one for my strawberry 🍓 water. Then I found a clear vase and batteries to hook up the string of lights.
It felt like my purchases were better used than normal. This might be the key to making sure I actually use everything I buy. Sometimes I have good intentions, but things just don’t get opened if they get set aside as soon as I walk in the door. I think if I know exactly when I will use something and then make sure I use it at that time, I’m more likely to get some enjoyment out of it.
Friends are interesting. We deeply need them in our lives. We need people we can bounce ideas off of and tell the, what’s going on in our life. As we age, it seems that our friends either grow with us or we out grow them. It’s awkward when we out grow them. It’s like your stuck in between what was your friendship and what it is now, and you are not sure what to do about it.
I had a really good friend once who took herself off the medication she was taking and she thought she was better off because of it, but everyone around her felt like they were getting the caught in the aftermath. It was a messy thing and waiting it out didn’t seem to help, but it actually got worse. She’d cancel plans when I was already seated at a restaurant waiting for her. Finally, I sent her a heart felt letter stating what I felt and that I worried about her. I hoped she’d understand, but she verbally attacked everything I’d ever done for her and what she had to put up with while being my friend.
Another close friend I had got pregnant and I became that one person she absolutely hated while she was pregnant. We actually talked openly about how I irritated her and the fact that sometimes it just happens when your hormones are all out of wack. When she had the baby, I thought things would get back to normal, but they didn’t. Things had been building and building…then at a dinner one night, I tried to tell a story and she interrupted and finished my story for me in a very loud voice. The room was silent as I slowly realized it wasn’t a good idea for me to be around her anymore. Apologies at that point really don’t help.
I have a friend who is unhappy with her life and has been for several years, but doesn’t really have a solution on what to do. It seems that she is unhappy with the major aspects of her life. Her job, home and marriage seem to be in turmoil, and it’s only a matter of time before they all explode. But she refuses to make a proactive movement to fix anything. She’s told me that she needs to fix her medication and that’s part of the problem, but I’ve heard this for five years or more. I’ve tried to help, but it feels like I’ve exhausted all ideas and you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to fix the issues that are destroying their life. For me, this is a tough place to be because her issues affect our friendship.
Then there are friends that I knew when I met them I knew we’d be friends forever. There was something about them that I can’t quite put my finger on. It was just there. Maybe it was just an overall sense of being accepted. Or someone you feel comfortable telling whatever it is your going through at that time. These are the friends I see regularly or as often as I can. Every few years, it feels like I need to evaluate where I am with my friends and if it still makes sense for me to be friends with some people. It gives me a sense of dread sometimes, but it’s also something that can’t be avoided. In order to grow and move on, sometimes it’s necessary.
I know that when I come home and my eyes hurt that I’ve had an emotionally draining day where I had to focus on multiple things at the exact same time, and had very little downtime in between tasks or talking to people. For me, this is stressful. One night this past week, I came home from work with a tight knot in my chest, and my mind felt like it was all over the place and I could not concentrate. I spent the day dealing with one person after another and felt stressed out emotionally. I did the following things in the space of 30 minutes and completely calmed myself down. I ended up having a productive and fun evening….when normally I would’ve stared at the TV all night and eventually calmed down within 3-4 hours.
I’ve never done this before and I’m not even sure where came from, but I can only say that I did exactly what I felt like my body needed at that very minute. It constantly amazes me how if we listen to our body and tells us exactly what we need. I’d like to call this 30 minutes of targeted mental therapy and the next time I feel this way, I’m using this list again.
- Cold eye patches with black out sleeping mask over them
- Deep breathing and some chanting of ums
- Tapping around the face and head area
- 5 minutes of deep stretching
- Peach room spray
- Drank a cup of lemon balm and rose tea
Afterwards, my chest felt light and easy and completely at peace. I highly recommend you try this or something that is specific for you. Love, love, love it.
This has been a slow and quite week and it has been perfect to get caught up on work. It’s amazing to me how a holiday seems to slow down the work week. Employers don’t really respond to calls as quickly, and most people have automatic email responses that they will be out of town for at least part of the week. This typically happens around Christmas and New Years as well.
It’s a good time to get caught up on the piles of work that seem to accumulate during the rest of the year, and it is good to just get a break. For the most part, it probably also occurs around other major holidays, but usually I’m on vacation around those times and don’t seem to notice it. 🙃
Thomas Edison once said, “If we did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.”
I love this quote. It has so many layers. The fact is that most people do not do the things they are capable of. Some because of fear, time, laziness, or maybe selfishness. Some people push themselves all of the time to accomplish the things they want to do. While others push themselves when they really want something.
I love to try new things. I got this kit to make some homemade lotions, lotion bars, and salt scrubs. I made a vanilla and peppermint salt scrub, used it and loved it. It made my skin so soft. Once, I had a body polish done at a spa with a coffee scrub followed by a coffee scented lotion. I thought it was amazing and invigorating. So now I’m going to try to figure out how to make that because they have been difficult to find.
If I had had a kit like this when I was in high school…Who knows where I’d be today? 🙂
I’d love to read a book that’ll solve all of my problems. Isn’t that what we expect a self help to do? I’ve heard stories of movies or books that will change peoples lives. Most of the books on my bookshelf have caught some part of my imagination or creative side. Something I want to know more about or add to my life.
I’ve had an idea for a novel in my head for almost 30 years. I’ve added to it over the years. Someday, I plan to write that book. I’ve built it up in my mind so much that I’m starting to believe that book will help me to work out the issues in my life. I’d love to be able to incorporate parts of these books that have captured my imagination, but I’m not sure that’s possible.
A few years ago, I was reading “Finding Your North Star” with a friend and we planned to discuss it each week at a 2-person book club. It was a pretty good book and it almost forced you to take a good look at your life and what is missing and I felt like we were really getting to the good part. Then another friend of ours decided she wanted to join the book club. She didn’t ask…just said she was joining. She showed up at her first meeting and declared that the author was of a certain religion and she didn’t feel she could trust the information contained in the book because of that. My other fiend, because the book forced her to really look at her life and made her slightly uncomfortable…followed suit and said she didn’t want to finish it. I tried my best to change her mind, but it didn’t work. My sounding board was gone. I had written notes in the margin and had really gotten into the that book. I still have it. I need to finish it.
When I was young and living at home I read quite a bit. I loved getting inside a book and just living in another world for a few hours. It’s been years since I’ve been able to find a book I’ve liked that much. I’d love to find a really good, well written story that has an ending I’m not expecting. A good summer read, so to speak. I believe that books should take you away completely when you read it or help you change your life. Any recommendations?